"Grammar Nazi" Morons

- Mike's Rambling

People who use the term “Grammar Nazi”

Somewhere along the line, people with horrible language skills got the idea that they were some sort of persecuted minority, like the Jews in WW2 Nazi Germany.

In fact, some people even seem to take a perverse pride in their linguistic incompetence. George W. Bush never fixed his mispronunciation of “nuclear” as “nucular”, and you can’t seriously believe no one ever told him, or that he never heard. No, he never fixed it because he had no particular desire to pronounce it correctly. Or, to put it another way, he was not embarrassed to pronounce it incorrectly. Similarly, if you point out to a redneck that “I seen you at the park on the weekend” is incorrect and should be “I saw you at the park on the weekend”, he’ll get angry at you. Nobody gets angry at you when you correct their math; why do they get angry when you correct their grammar?

Of course, laziness is also a factor: people are increasingly handing in job applications and résumés which are filled with spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors (and they’re so stupid that they don’t realize what an employer typically does with such carelessly crafted résumés). Another example of laziness is the dreaded phenomenon of SMS speak, where words are compressed into barely recognizable abbreviations:

SMS: “you ned 2 stop bn a snob. who cares if i spell wrong o do grammar wrong? i still get d point ax.”

English translation: “You need to stop being such an elitist. Who cares if I misspell words or get my grammar wrong? I still get the point across.”

Laziness is a flimsy excuse for such behaviour. Does it really save that much time to create such an unreadable statement? The incomprehensible SMS version is still ¾ the size of the original one, and it is nowhere near as readable. And what about people who use a spell-check, but who clearly don’t understand which words they’re supposed to use?

Moron: “i went to the grocery store to pick up some cookie’s for you’re mom but their closed.”

English translation: “I went to the grocery store to pick up some cookies for your mother, but they’re closed.”

Sorry, but if you are an adult and English is your first language but you can’t grasp the concept of capitalization or figure out the difference between “they’re”, “there”, and “their” (or the difference between “your” and “you’re”, or the difference between “weather” and “whether”), then you’re a moron. Similarly, if you always use an apostrophe when you pluralize a noun, then you’re a moron. By the way, don’t tell me language is unimportant: the greatest advancement in the history of the human race has been the development of written language. It is hardly something we should take lightly.

Now I’m not saying everyone has to be perfect, but quite frankly, it appears that an increasing share of the population is not even trying. You should at least make an effort, for fuck’s sake! And you certainly should not get the idiotic idea in your head that you’re being unjustly persecuted. When someone corrects your bad grammar, take it the same way you would if someone corrects your bad math: grow the fuck up and admit your error, instead of whining like a bitch and pretending you’re an oppressed minority.